ThadiusZho posted a comment on Friday 21st November 2014 2:03pm

Thank you once again for an amazing story.

Been following you since the very start of The Letters of Summer and am glad to see you writing again. Once more, you show us your own version of the HP world, tweaking just the little things (as you said, the cipher that was Daphne) that make it a remarkable read. I've read some stories with Daphne in it (Jeconais' Perfect Situations comes to mind) but never saw a 'not-Ice-Queen' version of it before. Remarkably fresh.

Hope you'll keep writing. Have no doubt that I'll be here to read it.

TZ

Kokopelli replied:

Wow, if you've been around since the start of TLOS, you've been working the fandom a long, long time.

I'm glad my little story gave you some enjoyment.

gadriam posted a comment on Friday 21st November 2014 1:52pm

Thank you, it was a lovely ride.

I enjoyed all your little twists and turns, and the ending, putting the Grimoire in context, was lovely.

I did enjoy the britishisms you managed to get in, and all in all, it was an engaging story based on an interesting concept and written with expert craftsmanship.

I have taken several cues from you in my ongoing typing exercise, and you're definitely staying on my alert list.

Thanks.

g

Kokopelli replied:

I'm an American, so I have to research the snot out of the Britishisms.  Google is my friend, but when I researched what beer is popular in Scotland, I found a brand that Tim (my British beta) said was suitable for getting drunk in public places if you were a bum, or words to that effect.  

Best of luck with your typing.

Chris1 posted a comment on Friday 21st November 2014 12:56pm

That was a very satisfying ending to a wonderful story. Thank you!

Kokopelli replied:

You are welcome.

amulder posted a comment on Friday 21st November 2014 12:42pm

Thank-you, John.

Kokopelli replied:

Thanks for following all these years.  How's the woodworking?

stormmaster posted a comment on Friday 21st November 2014 11:50am

A most satisfying ending to a superb story. Well done sir, well done. Thank you for sharing this with us.

Kokopelli replied:

Consider it a gift for the holidays.

Pennywise posted a comment on Friday 21st November 2014 7:01am

Awesome chapter.

Kokopelli replied:

thanks

Aaran St Vines posted a comment on Friday 21st November 2014 6:51am

Very interesting development of the Harry - Hermione relationship. Notone I recall from fanfiction so all the more clever in its originalty.

There are a lot of little clevernesses in this tale.

Good work!

Kokopelli replied:

By definition, if you love someone, their well being is more important than your own.  By that measure, I think it's clear that Hermione loves Harry.

In canon, I don't think that Harry finds Hermione to be very attractive.  I certainly find her attractive,  but that's not the point.

So, yes, this chapter let me play with my own visualization of the dynamics of the Harry-Hermione relationship.  Even JKR admits that Ron-Hermione was a mistake, and in the fan-fic world, the Harmonians have won.

I obviously love Hermione, given the way I write her in all of my stories.  I don't think it's fruitful to pair Hermione to Harry, which is why I go with the lesser pairings.

I may even take up where you left off and do a true Harry-Millicent story, but I can't think of one right now that can improve on your story.

I enjoyed JBern's To Fight the Coming Darkness, but that was largely a plot driven story, and Susan was largely a prop, not a well developed character.  I'm tempted to play there next - if I do anything at all.

Aaran St Vines posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 10:59pm

Oh, wow!

Will you let Daph kill her, or will Harry force his way out of the shadows and save her?

Or something else?

Fascinating!

Kokopelli replied:

That would be telling...

DrT posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 6:23pm

Hopefully Hermione (and also Luna) will find some sort of happiness by the end of the story

Kokopelli replied:

If you've read through my works, you know I love to write Hermione.  I find her attractive, even if Harry doesn't.  Luna is difficult for me, I love the character, but I find it almost impossible to write Luna well, which is why she has such a cameo role in this story.

Hermione ends up as the Maid of Honor at the wedding, and goes home with what becomes her long term boyfriend.  Luna, she's in the background, making things happen.

dogbertcarroll posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 3:10pm

Only two things struck me as unbelievable, Harry having problems riding a horse and James being a bully. Good otherwise.

Kokopelli replied:

James being a bully is canon.  See the Pensieve memory chapters in Order of the Phoenix.

As to the horse, I'm the writer, so it happened that way. ;-)

Aaran St Vines posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 12:35pm

Before your A/N I had the feeling you are almost finished setting up everything and you are about to begin the "action." Action in this story not being too fast paced, and maybe no action/adventure, but just the beginning of the really good stuff.

Delightful!

Kokopelli replied:

Chapter 4 was all about Grace & Daphne (and certain foundational garments) but primarily it's about putting things in place for Chapters 5 & 6.

Aaran St Vines posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 10:34am

Quick, I must google "Granuaile."

Fine writing.

Kokopelli replied:

It's a lovely Gaelic name for a woman, it's pretty much "Grace."   It was also the Gaelic name of an Irish pirate chieftainess (Grace O'Malley) who was active at the time of Queen Elizabeth

Aaran St Vines posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 9:56am

Very believable, hesitant and dually insecure first dating efforts.

Well done!

Kokopelli replied:

Courtship can be wonderful, but the initial phases are so awkward.

FeNo posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 9:25am

Oh don't worry too much... probably more than 90 percent of the anvils will turn out to be cheaply made but overprizedly sold shit.. after all those aren't honest, fire-steeled smiths choosing them for serious work but showmen choosing them for the appeal. Any workable anvil most likely will not look half as romantic as the chapels want. :)

A thrilling chapter with a big revelation... So... it was the posession that moved Harry enough to make up his heart? Both the shock how much the Damocles sword of the unfulfilled oath can take influence about the girl he's growingly fond of and the knowledge that her heart is in the right place as she still fought this spirit i guess? Yeah, sounds like Harry alright.

Thanks for adding the bit with the two girls talking it out. I can't say i'm completely happy with Hermione's reason... a lot of women don't think they'll want to be a mother when 19... Many re-decide over the next 25 years ;) but it IS solidly argumented and I can understand the fear that being not all he might search for in a women would destroy their close friendship, it's not become a so prominent motive in fanfiction out of nothing. Having him as a brilliant friend but maybe feel a bit lonely when he's not there or having him as boyfriend/husband until it grows so unbearable she'll loose both? A clever girl can only make the one decision, can she? (Another story might go the "but she's even braver than clever, she got into Gryffindor! route, but here that never was a choice and so the decision just fits and sounds pretty good.)

Slytherin sounds cool. She would never have survived 7 years there, but as a mind experiment... yes that's fitting...

Andromeda was great... I do not quite understand why she needs to trick him into magical capture for this talk though. Shouldn't he be mature and grown up enough to keep his word if she asks him to promise not to run out until she says the talk is over? Glueing him to his place makes him look 13.

Kokopelli replied:

In the blacksmith world we speak of ASOs - Anvil Shaped Objects, which are usually cast iron and don't really work well for anything other than a door stop.

Then there are the collectors.  There's a robust market of collectors who are driving up prices for real anvils.  It used to be that $2.00/pound was a fair price, but the collectors are driving it up to $4-5/pound, which is pretty much what you can buy a top of the line anvil for new.  The life of a well-made anvil will exceed that of the blacksmith by a large measure.  I suspect that I'm the 4th or 5th smith to have used my anvil, and it's no object of beauty, but it's mine.

Daphne asks Harry what make up his mind, and he replies seeing her in her nightgown, hurling magic at her sister.  Harry's attracted to Daphne, likes her family (the midget notwithstanding), likes her basic world view and where she wants to go in life.  He identifies with her in a lot of ways, given that both put everything on the line to protect the ones they love.  It's not her prefection that he finds attractive, because she's not perfect, it's her striving.

Daphne comes out of the box saying "if you marry me, I'll be a good wife and I'll never leave you" or words to that effect.  That's actually fairly effective as a pitch to Harry, which is why he didn't dismiss it out of hand.   Her "10 reasons to marry Daphne" speech was actually quite effective, and this was before she got the roadmap to Harry that Hermione provided.

The Daphne/Hermione conversations are key to this story.  At the end of the day, canon Harry doesn't find Hermione all that attractive, so the issue of H-Hr is moot.  I'm always fond of Hermione and love writing her, but I'm not the protagonist.  In real life, Harry, given how he was raised, would probably be someone who starts fires and tortures animals for fun rather than being this simplistic hero.  I try to write something in-between.  As I see Harry, he's looking for where he fits in, and he wonders what it's like to be a real boy (hence the Pinnochio references).  In some ways he's like Data in Star Trek, who also is trying to figure out what it means to be human.

As to the scene with Andi, I'm pushing 60, but the thought of a mother figure giving me "the talk" complete with anatomically correct dolls, with the focus being on how to make the witch happy is something that would make me cringe.  It was a bit of comedy that I'd thought up years ago and spliced into this story - it's not central to the plot, but it's fun none-the-less.  In some ways Harry _is_ thirteen - with the scars of a fourty year old soldier.

 

Thanks for your kind words.

 

 

Aaran St Vines posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 7:26am

It is great to see you back at it again. I have so much writing for work and for "my other work" that I cannot see myself getting back in soon - but I really hope to.

Your point about originality in fanfiction is one of the most important things I look for the genre. You're off to an intriguing start with this tale.

Though I don't know that you need it, if you want another set of eyes, I volunteer. I am a speedy beta.

Best regards!

Wolfric posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 4:21am

Another fine chapter. Thanks for writing. W.

Kokopelli replied:

Thanks for reading.

sanbeegoldiewhitey posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 3:41am

Wonderful chapter. It really made me very happy.

Kokopelli replied:

Well, happy is good, right?

sanbeegoldiewhitey posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 3:17am

Beautiful chapter. The attempted seduction by Astoria was nicely done; so was the scene of Harry teaching Daphne how to fly without a broom. I don't think Daphne will manage to kill Astoria. The noble Harry will stop Daphne from killing her sister.

Kokopelli replied:

We'll see...

sanbeegoldiewhitey posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 2:47am

Terrific chapter. The best yet of this story. Grace's story made me emotional and made me admire Daphne's father. Daphne loves Harry already and Harry likes Daphne now.

Kokopelli replied:

Just wait for what's to come!

sanbeegoldiewhitey posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 2:09am

I am liking your story so far. I think Harry will marry Daphne even without love as long as he develops a positive feeling for her like fondness. I just don't think Harry would allow Daphne to lose her magic. Harry's strongest trait - nobility, was also sometimes his weakness. I am glad you decided to write this unique story.

Kokopelli replied:

It will continue to unfold.