sanbeegoldiewhitey posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 1:41am

Your Daphne was plain and I liked her anyway. Jeconais' Daphne had always been "drop-dead" gorgeous. But I like your Daphne more because she was willing to sacrifice herself by marrying a monster in order to protect her family and the Greengrass vassals and employees. Great girl, really wife material and I hope Harry realizes that because whether in canon or fan fiction, he was quite clueless when it comes to girls.

Kokopelli replied:

Most people are plain.

I like Jeconais, but I take a different approach to characters.

sanbeegoldiewhitey posted a comment on Thursday 20th November 2014 12:18am

Very interesting and for me very original. I have never read a story where Voldemort was betrothed to any witch.

Kokopelli replied:

I try to do new things.

WhiteElfElder posted a comment on Wednesday 19th November 2014 10:54pm

I like that everything is working out. It is too bad that Hermione does not get Harry...but there is always something in the future.

Kokopelli replied:

Not from this author...

diagonalpumpkin posted a comment on Wednesday 19th November 2014 9:06pm

Thank you so much for updating today. It was another truely wonderful chapter. The cliff hanger has been on and off my mind since I read it. And being able to read it on my lunch break today gave me a bright spot in an otherwise dim day. Thank you again, and I hope you have a good rest of the week.

Kokopelli replied:

Thanks for y our kind words - I hope your week looks up.

Michael10 posted a comment on Wednesday 19th November 2014 8:44pm

I could almost see Hermione as Slytherin.

so Tori got some broken bones and the couple pulled a small prank on announcing. keep up the good work

Kokopelli replied:

Broken bones in the Wizarding world seems to be a minor inconvenience.

Riegert8 posted a comment on Wednesday 19th November 2014 7:33pm

It good that Daphne did not kill her sister, truth is that would not shock me. I read a few storys that someone killed a brother or sister, in an couple story's that person killed most of his family.

Kokopelli replied:

Yeah, but I don't do that sort of stuff.

jilumasam posted a comment on Wednesday 19th November 2014 4:20pm

Just marvellous...

Interesting point about the possession...is it going to come back up again?

Thank you for writing :D

Kokopelli replied:

Daphne's comment in the next chapter is "I can't wait to get this thing out of my head."

bendin posted a comment on Wednesday 19th November 2014 3:02pm

Thank you for this beautiful story. It reminds me my marriage and those times when we have been happy. You wrote something sweet, wise and touching. Again - thank you. Bendin from Poland

Kokopelli replied:

You're quite welcome.  The next chapter is sweet as well.

stormmaster posted a comment on Wednesday 19th November 2014 2:47pm

Evil cliffhanger bad. Quick update good. I thought of leaving the review there, but that wouldn't be much if a review, would it? The cliffhanger certainly had me (and everyone else more than likely) on the edge of our seats, and a quick end to that misery is greatly appreciated. I certainly like the direction you took Daphne in this story, and the Hermione is very different from the many other portrayals by other authors. I must say I like this take on Harry, Daphne, and Hermione, much more human and relatable. You can feel more of Harry's inhumanity (brought on by his upbringing at the hands of the Dursleys) and his general puzzlement at some of the "normal" niceties of life. You can feel the depth of Hermione's love and commitment to Harry, and Daphne's too. Really vivid amazing characters. I look forward to the ending. (You are writing one more chapter, right? The story doesn't feel quite finished if you were to leave it there.)

Kokopelli replied:

Chapter 7 is in the can, weighing in at 14,994 words.  So, yes, there's a little more to the story.

amulder posted a comment on Wednesday 19th November 2014 11:49am

So is the greengrass grimoire this story's pseudo-macguffin?

At least I have seen not the slightest hint that we might look into it.

And I rather like Slytherin Hermione. But the one nit that I would pick with that scene is the thought that your deepest desire at age 11 is the same at age 18...

thanks for the story. it makes me smile.

Kokopelli replied:

You'll get a peek - for the most part the grimoire would have been of no use to Riddle, but there's no way that they could have ever convinced him of it.  The magic that would have been really useful was the shadow traveling magic, but that's not in the grimoire!

As to the durability of desires, it's about a reasonable as choosing character traits at age eleven for organizing the school house system.

ToddGilliss posted a comment on Monday 17th November 2014 11:00am

Looking forward to the next round chapters

Kokopelli replied:

Thanks for your kind words.  It will release on Friday.

delphinous posted a comment on Sunday 16th November 2014 10:57pm

i've only read the first chapter of this story, at the moment, and i intend to continue to read it, as i am currently enjoying it. however, i am writing this review to point out that in this story: by right of conquest, you start off this chapter (chapter the first) with journal entries that are dated in the later months of 1997, and then move on to harry vanquishing voldemort in the early months of 1997. it is a small error, but it had me rather confused for a while, because i wasn't sure if it was indicating that harry had become tom riddle by right of conquest and we were seeing 'future' events or if it was just a continuity error.

sorry if this isn't a nice review, i am liking to story so far and am going to keep reading it.

Kokopelli replied:

Thanks, I guess I'll have to cut the pay of my continuity checker.  It's fixed now.

The story begins in summer of 1997 and ends in the summer of 1998.

WhiteElfElder posted a comment on Sunday 16th November 2014 5:26pm

Daphne is acting irrationally at the moment, which makes me think it is magic driving her. I hope that someone comes along to prevent the needless death.

Kokopelli replied:

I've got it covered.

Lon Huey posted a comment on Sunday 16th November 2014 8:39am

Good buildup in this chapter. So Astoria will die. Another way for Harry to see a side of Daphne that understands the sacrifices of what must be done over what is easy.

But, will Harry be able to forgive Daph if she kills The Midget? Does Harry look at this as just being part of his semi-charmed kind of life? Will Harry look at Astoria's incident as a broom issue, which he understands, or a horse issue, which he doesn't?

good cliffhanger.

Kokopelli replied:

Astoria probably deserves a lot of things, but capital punishment at the hands of her sister is a little extreme.

DrT posted a comment on Saturday 15th November 2014 10:33pm

Great cliff hanger!

Kokopelli replied:

Yeah ,well, sooner or later it's necessary.

DrT posted a comment on Saturday 15th November 2014 9:02pm

An interesting world you are constructing in this fic!

Kokopelli replied:

Thanks for your kind words.

noylj posted a comment on Saturday 15th November 2014 7:10pm

Please update story. Can't wait to read what happens to the midget...

Kokopelli replied:

Next Friday.

Michael10 posted a comment on Saturday 15th November 2014 6:45pm

gonna shave her bald isn't she?

keep up the good work

Kokopelli replied:

Think exsanguination, not exfoliation.

Noble Korhedron posted a comment on Saturday 15th November 2014 9:55am

I'm inclined to believe the midget here. SHe was just being EXTREMELY dumb. There's a reason even such basic stuff as victory rolls is banned for newly qualified pilots. They prefer you to do your aerobatics or combat flying as safely as possible, not somewhere where the first error you make kills you....

Kokopelli replied:

Astoria is an extremely good pilot, but not quite good enough for the Firebolt-X.  This will become a bit more clear in the next chapter.

Zamia posted a comment on Saturday 15th November 2014 6:07am

Excellent and enjoyable yarn. You have Harry's naivety down pat, poor fellow. Hopefully between Daphne & Hermione, he will be educated into the requirements of the fairer sex. Harry has always wanted a family but what he wants and what he gets will be a long road. And he will probably have Teddy atthe back of his mind. Nice little cliffie. Waiting to see what happens. Cheers.

Z

Kokopelli replied:

Thanks for reading.  Teddy will be a fixture at Harry's house, but he'll be raised by Andi.