uthamm posted a comment on Friday 28th July 2017 5:08pm for Chapter the Eighth and Last

Compentent Neville before 7th year, interested engaged parents for Harry and a dramatically reduced Dumbledore?

Very nice - this would be a Harry who is a lot more like James . . . learning for fun and interest rather than life and death. I also liked the play to Remus' belief that nobody would want him by having Alice ask!

Thanks for sharing.

Kokopelli replied:

In an earlier chapter I had Julia reacting to Remus's "who would want me" statement, yes, Alice _had_ to initiate things.

As to James and Neville, they're polite and kind, two traits that would never be used to describe Sirius or James, who were really spoiled jerks.

vl100butch posted a comment on Friday 28th July 2017 1:39pm for Chapter the Eighth and Last

Thank you for writing this wonderful story. I haven't spent a lot of time here lately and drifted into this by accident, but for the last few weeks seeing an announcement that the next chapter is posted was good news.

I hope you'd consider writing something else in this particular universe.

Kokopelli replied:

This story is now done.  I could see some fun in writing Daisy in a subsequent HP tale, but that would most likely be a one-off.

pilotg21969 posted a comment on Friday 28th July 2017 12:06pm for Chapter the Eighth and Last

I enjoyed this story thoroughly. I am particularly fond of stories that deviate from 'canon': that ask, and try to answer the "what if?" questions. Those that are well-written, as this one is, are a feast for the mind. Thank you.

Kokopelli replied:

That's the whole point of fan-fiction.  Now, there are some what-if's that aren't all that interesting to me - what if Hermione were a boy and Harry and Ron were girls has potential, but it's not something I want to write.  

dogbertcarroll posted a comment on Friday 28th July 2017 11:16am for Chapter the Eighth and Last

A solid sensable ending and we discover that Remus gets wordy when flustered. Thanks for wrting this.

Kokopelli replied:

There are so many ways that scene could have gone - Remus was interested, but not willing to hash everything out at the moment.  Canon Remus has very low self esteem - no one could love him because he's a monster - which is why Tonks pushing the issue is so sweet at the end of Half-Blood Prince.  His willingness to abandon Tonks in the next book made me want to hurl.

Quizer posted a comment on Friday 28th July 2017 8:50am for Chapter the Eighth and Last

There's a repeated mistake in all the recent chapters where the name of Thorfinn Rowle is constantly spelled as one word, with the space between his first and last name removed (ThorfinnRowle). You might want to go through the entire story to search-and-replace that.

This story has been very enjoyable. Great to see you're still writing after so many years. Keep up the good work!

Kokopelli replied:

The ThorfinnRowle problem seems to be somewhere in the website - when I post the HTML file the word is correct, but it shows up wonky once the file goes live.  Thanks for your kind words.

sh777 posted a comment on Friday 28th July 2017 7:17am for Chapter the Eighth and Last

Really enjoyed this story, thanks.

Kokopelli replied:

You're welcome.

Wolfric posted a comment on Friday 28th July 2017 2:49am for Chapter the Eighth and Last

Congratulations for finishing another fine story. I am always glad to hear from you so whenever time and inclination permit I would love to read some more. Thanks for writing. W.

Kokopelli replied:

Thanks for reading.

Wanderer posted a comment on Friday 28th July 2017 2:23am for Chapter the Eighth and Last

I really liked how consistent Remus was, and the concept of embracing their wolf to learn voluntary turning really resonated with me. I may very well have to Yoink that (with credit, of course).

My only confusion is with Daisy, whose character seemed to be rather unpredictable in her mannerisms before somehow settling down rather drastically in what seemed like a very short time. Perhaps I just misunderstood the timeline.

Overall this was quite a lot of fun, with a very nice finish to leave a content smile at the finish (?).

Thanks for sharing your time and talent, it's really nice to read something new from you!

Kokopelli replied:

Daisy is my Liza Doolittle character - when she first appears she's a smart but uneducated (illiterate) teen who was raised by wolves.  She has a good ear, so she learns how to talk to fit in, but she still uses words by ear - so it's fairy moans rather than pheremones, semester rather than trimester.  There's all sorts of gaps here, because I'm trying to write a short piece, not a 300k word monster.

Fic Chick posted a comment on Thursday 27th July 2017 10:54pm for Chapter the Eighth and Last

I Iiked this fic.

Kokopelli replied:

Me too.

apassov posted a comment on Thursday 27th July 2017 10:05pm for Chapter the Eighth and Last

This was absolutely wonderful. Thanks!

Jason9 posted a comment on Thursday 27th July 2017 10:02pm for Chapter the Eighth and Last

As always, I greatly enjoyed this story. On paper the outline probably wouldn't sound half as good as the story actually is, but your characters, and the depth of motivations, settings, and your writing style in general make it an absolute pleasure. Thank you for taking the time to write and publish it - I only wish it were longer!

Kokopelli replied:

If I were getting paid for this, it would be longer, and more detailed.  This is a hobby that fits into the crevices in my life when I have time.  Thanks for reading.

reseh posted a comment on Thursday 27th July 2017 9:07pm for Chapter the Eighth and Last

I really enjoyed this story. I liked the strong Remus. I liked the wolves, especially Maud and Daisy. This was a lot of fun to read, even though I had to re-read last chapter to get it straight (tricksy writer!). I think this was a good ending spot, but on the other hand I would enjoy more. Thanks a lot for posting!

amulder posted a comment on Thursday 27th July 2017 8:51pm for Chapter the Eighth and Last

A nice ending... I think I am most interested in how Daisy transforms from a heavily accented speaker to the gracefully lady of the last few paragraphs. And my mat says she would only be 30 at that point.

I really like your Alice a lot. Very strong.

But that sorting is where you lost me. I am a strong believer in choice when it comes to sorting and you have Harry sorted over his objections!?!?

Hmm, no Snape? I may need to search back through the chapters to see if I missed something there.

Kokopelli replied:

Daisy is my Liza Doolittle - she's an illiterate hillbilly when she first appears, but she wants to fit in, so she does so by ear (and learns to read).  She's still using words by ear - fairy moans for pheremones, semester for trimester.

I like Alice too, but I've always like to write strong female characters.

As to the sorting, Harry wasn't as desparate in this storting it was more  "Hufflepuff, but I wanted to stay with Neville!"  The Hat was sorting for the benefit of Hogwarts, which needed the BWL to reinforce Hufflepuff, the neglected house.

Evan Mayerle posted a comment on Thursday 27th July 2017 8:07pm for Chapter the Eighth and Last

Very nice round-up and ending. That last scene with Daisy and Hermione was priceless and I daresay Neville and Harry may already have their future ladies picked out (I get the impression that Daisy generally gets her way - it's been called a "whim of iron" in other circles).

This was a most enjoyable story and I very much appreciate that you continue to write most enjoyable fan fiction.

Kokopelli replied:

That scene is a bonus - and not part of the original arc, but I can see Daisy looking into the social development of her favorite nephews.  Can you imagine the cool factor of having a somewhat crazy aunt who's a werewolf who wrestles Dementors and walks away victorious?

dennisud posted a comment on Thursday 27th July 2017 6:58pm for Chapter the Eighth and Last

Would have loved to see what happens after 4th year but I see why you had to finish as you did. BUT, If you change your mind, How will 5th-7th year go?

Kokopelli replied:

Not going there - the story is done.

anonymous5 posted a comment on Thursday 27th July 2017 5:23pm for Chapter the Eighth and Last

What a delightful tale. Thanks for sharing it with us! I've always appreciated your turns of phrase, unique settings, and idealized character behavior; it's all very slick and sublime. Again, thank you.

Kokopelli replied:

Thanks for your kind words.